One night in the late 90s, probably hanging out at one of the frequented sets of Lancaster houses, our friend Fonz asked if we wanted to check out a super haunted house in Tehachapi, CA. This was at least a 45 minute venture north, but I was stoked since I've always been a believer in ghosts/goblins/demons. I love watching scary movies for entertainment, but the second I imagine the act happening in real life, I tremble. Despite still sleeping with a night light and hugging my assortment of plushies, I love it - truly love it. And don't judge yo - the plushies are often designer and awesome, and I make my own, cuz i'm awesome. :)
I digress... So Fonz peaks our interest and down the road we go. It's Fonz, our friend Ezra, our friend Melissa, her then boyfriend Bryan, me and my then boyfriend Auggie. We pile into two cars. I was driving Auggie and myself in my dark green Honda Civic. Fonz or Ezra was driving his car, with Mellisa and Bryan in back. We eventually turned off the highway and followed Fonz down this janky dirt road for miles. At that point, our night was common since the whole desert is filled with dirty and janky streets. But the moon was gigantic and bright, casting a luminous, blue shadow over every inch of grey & black. The kind of light where you can almost turn everything else off and still see. Almost..
After driving for what I remember as 20 minutes, we finally pull over to the right, park, and get out of the car. Picture the dirt road laying before and behind us. Blue and grey lit tumbleweeds on either side, old cars, tires, junk, wood, trash, and probably ants. Gah I hate ants. We were silent for a spell and Melissa and I probably started squealing and grabbing any of the guys.
About 100-150 feet in front of us, behind a rusty chain link fence, stood a 2-story wooden, apocalyptic doll house. Most rooms were exposed to the night air because they were missing the side wall. The remaining were half open, covered by wooden slats, broken and jagged. Fonz encouraged us to walk up to the house, but we were all really freaked out. We remained frozen in our shoes. Him telling us the history didn't help, either. Apparently the person who owned it was a witch. She and her coven would practice their witchcraft, trying to summon spirits and demons. The witch was said to later be murdered by her coven after a ritual. She was found hung by the second story banister, gutted above a pentagram. Dude. Again, facing that story in true life was fucking heart-stopping palpitations. But since i'm outta 'danger', I WANNA GO BACK! It's a vicious cycle I put my bod through..
Right as we were about to trespass the fence, we saw a single light through a broken window. Almost like an electric flicker candle. It was just far enough to make us question whether we were actually seeing it, but all of us had the same vision. So it had to be true - right? It seemed to float and move from room to room. {heart racing then & now} We couldn't do anything but stare and grab each others hands. I think we ended up hearing something strange and that was that. We fled, speeding back down the dirt road toward civilization.
And here's where the po-lice come to play.
On our way back, Fonz and Ezra needed gas. We both pulled into a station with a convenience store, which made Auggie happy because he wanted candy or cigarettes or something. While he shopped inside, I stood outside the car, watching my friends all laughing and recounting the holy fuck what did we just do. I turned around to see if Auggie was still shopping or paying, and when I turned around a cop car had pulled up in front of me. And not in the we're getting coffee and donuts way - they were intentionally blocking my car. I froze and stopped breathing. Even now, cops make me nervous, but back then, they made me super nervous. I never had any good experience with them during this period of my life. Arresting my friends for smoking cigarettes and pot, harassing people at parties, and overall didn't ever make me feel any safer. I was always told cops are the ones you go to for help, but something about this agitated & confusing time for me proved otherwise. As a grownup, I watch A LOT of COPS the TV show because c'mon, it's a 30 minute package of awesome. It's also easier to sit back, enjoying the carnival ride since it would be rare I would ever find myself in those predicaments now. I still find some police officers who take me right back to Lancaster and the roughness I saw, but I have met others who are decent & nice.
So at this moment, I now find myself staring at them alone. Auggie is oblivious and the others aren't coming near me and I never blamed them, I wouldn't have either. I nano-secondly itemized everything on "my person" and in my car. Shit. Did I forget to take out that dope, was there leftover beer from the other night... anything that would give them a reason to haul me off. But no, I was clean. They stare at me through their giant windshield. I stood still not knowing what our next moves were. They get out of the car, come over and ask to search my vehicle. My defenses shot up and as plainly as possible, asked what cause they had. "We're the police" they said. NOPE! Not good enough, so I stated "Hey, i'm not doing anything so what are you looking for!" Their replay was "A Burger King was just robbed and you and your car fit the description. Two women in a black Honda Civic, wearing bandanas robbed the store about 10 minutes ago."
Ok, mental check. My car is dark green, it was me and Auggie, and to the best of my recollection, 10 minutes ago I was staring face to face with a ghost... So um no - that wasn't me officer. I relayed all this highly pertinent information. When they calmed a bit, they said they understood but since it was dark, black and green look similar and since my boyfriend wasn't in the car, there could have been a second lady. They asked nicer if they could search my car for bandanas and I guess, a sack of money. Once I knew I was clean and they certainly wouldn't find either of those things, I said yes. After a few minutes of an empty search, they thanked me and drove off. Auggie was staring at me with his wares, the others came over and we all kinda said what the fuck. I held it together much better than I expected, which was fantastic considering how unprepared I was.
These memories stir up every few years, sometimes when I see a police car or hear about an actual haunted house. I don't know the roads that could take me there now, despite wanting to TOTALLY go back. I hope other kids heard the tales and were braver than us. Despite much searching on the internets, I found no documents of the house or events that supposedly transpired. So kids, if you find out, please write a lil' something and help this old lady out.
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