Day 8: Onolicious (May 23)

Went for a jog in the morning.  It felt really good to be moving in a controlled manner and motivating against the backdrop of ugly tourists.



THE EATS:  Ono is good.  Grinds/Grindz is eating.  Eating is Ono.  It all makes sense now... 808 Grindz Cafe is one of the coolest places we've visited so far.  Located in Lahaina, which is northern Maui, tucked away towards the back of a shopping mall.  Like the portions of one dish aren't totally undue your pants buttons, but it's definitely pat your stomach as you leave.  The host feller was super cool and the waitress reminded me of someone who says the Hawaiian equivalent of toots.  RAINBOW FRENCH TOAST / RED VELVET PANCAKES WITH SOME KIND OF ONO FROSTING

LUNCH: So, um, did you like, um know Mick Fleetwood has a restaurant in Maui?  We stopped in for ice tea because duh.  While sipping, Travis and I pondered the serious lack of Landsliders, Fleetwood Mac & Cheese, Tuskan Chicken something or other, and for dessert RUMsmores (like Rumors, but with smores.)

We didn't go to Scoopy's because in addition to ice cream & treats, they also sold excursions.  I don't think so - I'll stick with just liking the name please.

DINNER: After the crater was Monkeypod!  Monkeypod Kitchen was a swell place, kinda sorta upscaley, up the street from our hotel.  They had lots of veggie things and I ate all of them.  Walking & hiking at the elevation we did on Crater Maui, and having not had much all day, a pizza sounded fanfuckingtastic.  No photos because I looked a fright.  ...the fashion sneers I got for wearing a grey fuzzy beanie... those cows can kick rocks.

Fighting the urge to become so relaxed that we'd dozed at the table, reminded me of the time Travis and I hiked Mount Wilson, er rather attempted the 13 mile one way trip.  I don't think we even got half way because it was more intense than we realized.  At the end of our feet ropes, we went to dinner.  But before we left, fell asleep in our car, in the parking lot.  WORTH IT.



THE DAY:  Lahaina park is for walking and farting.  No wait, arting.

THE HIKES:  On the way to Haleakala National Park is a tiny lavender farm & cafe: Maui Lavender.  They had lavender tea, scones, lemonade and a homemade cinnamon roll.  Holy roller.  She took our order up and the hot tea came straight away, however, the bun was lost between the nooks & crannies.  When we inquired, she realized the mistake and put a rush on it.  She found the "largest one in the tray" and made sure we got "extra icing."  At this point with our eating, what does it matter...

Haleakala National Park is a phenomenal place for a hike and breathtaking views of the island, or in our case, being high above an entire sky full of yummy fluffy clouds.

Day 7: A Mountain Of Fear (May 22)

I cannot even begin to convey how fucking nervous I am.  How terrified of the daylight, glowing endlessly before me.  I just want to scream I can't do it, I want to get sick, I want to run and hide under the covers, or to be called away on important puppy snuggle business.  Anything to avoid what I agreed to do back in that office, thousands of miles away.



THE ORIGINAL PLAN:  We thought our repelling adventure was yesterday, but nope, it's today.  So mustering up everything I found 24 hours previous, was twice fold needed again.  It all felt routinely uncomfortable...  There were two different guides today, two new faces I'd need to connect with in order to trust what I was about to do.  They both greeted us with smiles and handshakes: Rich and Anna from Rappel Maui.  Alright, they seem cool, the others from the group seem with it.  I put on my brave face and a calmness came over me; maybe I could do this.

Then there were two remaining excursioners who were quite late and I was getting antsy.  Maybe that's when my bangs made this wave homage.  I really needed to get going, despite not actually wanting to get to the top.  With every second of delay, my nerves were fluctuating.  They finally made it, but I had already tipped over the edge of mental exhaustion.

It's an hours drive up the Hana highway, pretty much exactly what we did Thursday.  The cliff and two waterfalls are located within a closed off portion of an arboretum, only available for this tour group.  Through the busted ass wooden gates we drive.

We start to suit up.

We give ourselves names.

We walk.

Travis rulez.

I panic.

I can't do it for all the words I couldn't articulate then, nor now.  But then Rich the guide suggests an option to go down the cliff tandom.  Ummmmm, ok.  trembles.  As he's suiting us both up, he gets some cords crossed and cooly remarks how he hasn't done this in a while.  Dude, seriously.  Even if you've never done this don't fucking tell me that.  I've been silently balling for the last 30 minutes, I'm about to ralph, I'm jittery, tense, guilty and disappointed in myself and a thousand other things.  Tell me nothing or tell me something, just not that.

One of the few tweets while on holiday, was after this.  I sum it up as, "I went repelling down a cliff yesterday.  And by repel, I mean was tethered to our guide, chunking my way down, with about as much grace as a cat climbing out of a bathtub."


Here's what Travis did.
Here's what Rich the tour guide did.
Here's what I will never do again.

 

THE EVENING:  I'm sure other things happened but my brain reset and stopped making new memories.

Day 6: Saved By the Email (May 21)

The previous days' mishap with the reservation was sorted by the time we got up.  The hotel is decent, although the rooms are somewhat dated.  But the view.  The view from our room was pretty slick.  I loved sitting outside, listening to the ocean pounding against the volcanic rock we're so sleeping on.  The concierge sorta made up with us by delivering local banana banana bread & fresh juice via room service.  we're cool.

Sitting outside on the lanai, Travis and I noticed a little lizard buddy, who was only 3 inches long.  He went table climbing and got stuck under some glass, so we lifted it up and he jumped like 4 feet!  Then he wiggled his way to the wall. <3

THE ORIGINAL PLAN:  Travis had booked an excursion for us today on Maui, one I wasn't terribly keen on doing: repelling down waterfalls.  This isn't me being a baby, this is no joke facing my fear about stepping over the edge, fearing certain types of heights, and paying money to do so.  I thought I had found my tough pants for shark water, but those were paper compared to the 100 ton armor I needed for this.  I agreed to do it back on the mainland with severe reservations.  Many times throughout our relationship, his encouragement in something I'm not totally comfortable with has proven to me I actually can do it; I can find strength and conquer.  So I thought, or rather, I HOPED this would be another one of those times.  This was the best case scenario playing out in my head.

We arrived at the meet up spot about 15 minutes prior to departure.  I grabbed all the stuff they asked us to bring and headed towards the white chariot of doom, wanting to run the other way.  The tour guide outside then van appeared to be getting ready to take off: closing & locking doors, securing ego's, etc.  I waved and said hey, we're here.  He looked dumbfounded, while I looked at the other three passengers, my stomach in knots.  I said yup, we have reservations for today and my knees starting to waver.  He said I don't think so and nervously flipped through his manifest... I looked at Travis with confusion, while internally jumping for joy that our reservation had been cancelled.

DAMMIT!  OUR RESERVATION IS FOR TOMORROW!  For fucks sake, I can't keep going up and down emotionally like this.



THE NEW PLAN:  After I secretly stopped hyperventilating, we had all day to basically do what we would have done Friday.



THE SUGAR MUSEUM:  Going to a sugar museum, sugar, sugar, SUUUUUGAR!!!!  {stop screaming mad because it's learning, not tasting.}  The Alexander & Baldwin Sugar Museum showed the history of the cane crop, who brought it here and why it became a commodity that took over much of the islands.  There was a precious volunteer who had you sign in, take your ticket money, explain the exhibit and then go back to knitting.  I would have loved to speak with her more...

Towards the end, I wondered to Travis whether we'd get a fresh off the mill sample, just like when you go to bread or tortilla factories.  And sure enough, as you exit the gift shop, sweet lady hands you a raw little sampling of their labors.

THE ROAD TO HANA:  It's a thing everybody says you have to do.  Start in Pa'ia town, drive the road to Hana, which I'm still not sure whether that's a town or simply the road name.  Basically, it's a 50 mile stretch of windy, curvy roads, with all kinds of hikes, food stands, and scenery all within reach of easy turnouts.

 

We found the Rainbow Eucalyptus forest.

We started a hike called Waikamoi Nature Trail, but all I kept thinking was Wak-a-mole.  It had two ways to go: upper and lower... As we started the upper portion, two German tourist hikers came from the lower section.  I asked them how that path was, thinking it was two different hikes.  He said it loops around but to be careful, it's slippy.  It should have been named the super, extra muddy buddy hike.

THE ROAD TO EVENING:  We crashed two luau's tonight, umm, because they are right on the beach and you can see everything by standing on the sidewalk.  The food is buffet style and you're packed in like tropical sardines, while terrible children run around into places they shouldn't be roaming.  Why would I pay a lot of money for this?

But before that, this.